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Bah Humbug!
December 2013

Jingle all the way 

Nobody is going to call me a racist.

One day, can we start a conversation another way?

Not until I've made it absolutely clear. This isn't a racist thing. It's a cultural thing. Someone's got to fight for British culture. And I'm not talking about those revolting skinheads, setting fire to buildings. Whatever they call themselves.

The EDL?

That's not what I'm about. No. I'm just sticking up for a good old traditional Christmas.

So what's the beef this time? Not the Roma gypsies then. They're fairly sound on Christmas, aren't they?

Don't start me on the Roma!

Fair enough.

And you can call it a "beef" if you want to  trivialise our most sacred and ancient cultural traditions. Like everyone else in this country seems to want to. But listen to this —

I'm all ears, Tiffany!

So Timmy came home from school last week with a note from his teacher asking my permission about a trip to Neasden — or somewhere ridiculous, so the class could visit a Hindu mosque. If you please!

Ooh! Is it the one near IKEA?

...and I've got no objections to Hindus or mosques...

Is it Muslim?

It is Muslim. That's right. I think. I can't remember now. I was so angry when I read the letter...

You've got me all confused!

Well-never mind. It's not really the point. Hindu, Muslim, whatever it is. Last time I checked, we were a Christian country. Thank you very much. And as a Christian country, at this time of year especially, when we're all feeling lovely and Christmassy, a bit of cultural sensitivity toward our religion might be in order. Or is that too much to ask?

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